Oh, he’s killing it, alright.
Tariffs—the magical economic boomerang Trump keeps throwing into the air and acting surprised when it hits American workers in the face. Dock workers? Truckers? You mean the blue-collar base that chanted “Make America Great Again” in matching red caps? Yeah, those folks are now clocking out—permanently. Because guess what? When no ships come in, no one unloads them. And when there’s nothing to haul, no one’s driving the rig.
Bravo, sir. A real jobs plan.
Let’s not pretend this is some 4D chess move from the economic whisperer of Queens. This is textbook self-sabotage dressed up as “tough love.” Tariff the world, claim you’re punishing China, but somehow the only people bleeding are standing at Long Beach and driving cross-country rigs with empty trailers. It’s like setting your kitchen on fire to roast a marshmallow. Bold. And entirely on brand.
And the spin? Oh, the spin is dizzying. “It’s about bringing jobs home!” Sure. Just ignore that manufacturing relies on imports—raw materials, machine parts, electronics. The U.S. doesn’t build iPhones from scratch in someone’s garage in Michigan. It needs chips from Taiwan, steel from South Korea, widgets from Vietnam. Choke that pipeline and you don’t have “economic independence.” You have factories that can’t make squat and workers who are “free” to file for unemployment.
Want numbers? The American Trucking Associations reported a drop in freight volumes during Q1 of this year, down nearly 4% year-over-year. Meanwhile, the International Longshore and Warehouse Union quietly laid off hundreds of port workers from Oakland to Savannah. That’s not a hiccup. That’s a hemorrhage.
But don’t worry—Trump has the solution. Just become a barista. Oh wait, sorry, no—he wants baristas to become truckers now, remember? Because who needs skilled logistics workers with years of experience when you’ve got a frappuccino artist who once parallel-parked a Prius?
The logic here is truly Olympic-level gymnastics. Lay off workers due to reduced imports. Blame it on other countries being “unfair.” Slap more tariffs on them. Get mad when they retaliate. Celebrate the chaos. Then fly to a rally and promise to “bring back jobs”—from yourself, apparently.
This would be funny if it weren’t so… real. Real families. Real paychecks. Real folks sitting at kitchen tables staring at bills and wondering what the hell just happened. And all while the same administration brags about “historic” economic strength on Truth Social. It’s like a firefighter bragging about how wet the house is—after he burned it down and hosed it with gasoline.
And let’s not forget the broader ripple. Retailers are getting hammered by import costs. Small businesses can’t price their goods competitively. And inflation? That beast you said you’d slay? Well, it just ordered another espresso and asked for oat milk. Because tariffs—especially ones in a globally interlinked economy—don’t just hit the exporter. They cycle back, hike up costs for everyone, and kneecap your own supply chains.
But hey—at least it makes a great soundbite: “We’re standing up to China!” It’s the economic equivalent of punching a wall to impress your date. Spoiler: the wall doesn’t flinch, and you’re the one icing your hand.
This isn’t about strategy. It’s not even about America First. It’s about optics. Rage as a policy tool. Disruption for disruption’s sake. And behind all the noise, behind the rallies and podium rants, lies a simple truth: tariffs don’t build. They break.
And right now, they’re breaking the backs of the very workers Trump promised to protect.
So yeah. He’s killing it.
Just not in the way he thinks.